// I Still Wish The Stars Would Speak//

Coming back from a coma or journey. 

One of the other. 

Same old story on new soil.

Same old pain on new skin. 

I was never happy without my sorrow. 

I will never be content without yesterday, today, and tomorrow. 

My how the changing of the tide 

has sprang a leak inside

within my soul. 

A body crying for the young and old. 

I wish I had what once was sold. 

This youth was wasted and we loved our wine. 

We did some crying, we did some time. 

we did some things to ease our minds 

but nothing changed until we saw inside. 

Inside outside reflecting still 

the inner desires, the outer will. 

My power, what power? Do I have? 

Am I all good or am I all bad? 

This is a hushed almost vaporous sigh 

but alarm alarm alarm the lights and sounds 

are upside down. 

I’m direct effect. 

I’ve seen and sat with the enemy. 

I’ve made their home, my bed. 

What lies are told to shut us out, cold. 

Stranded, terrified alone? 

I’m bogus billionaires staring at the ceiling. 

Wish I had what once was sold but I am ever fearing. 

A reign, a reign, God’s given pain. 

It’s beauitufl and sweet sorrow. 

Silence is both truth and irogance. 

Too hushed or too loud we alert the rest. 

Society knows nothing about what’s inside my chest. 

I’ve got a lot to punish, I’ve got a lot to save. 

I’ve got a mouth to empty and a ear to fill. 

I’ve got a handful of promises but I may never know. 

What’s black? What’s white? What’s truth? 

Relativity projection, that’s all we seem to use. 

I’ve heard a light, I’ve seen a sound. 

I’ve touched a color 

spinning round and round. 

You’re my dearest and my only. 

But I have been promised, forever lonely.

I still wish the stars would speak.

And gain strength in what makes us weak!

// An Inspired Life//

In all honesty, I cannot wait for what tomorrow has in store for me. Not just the next day but all of eternity. I am so enlightened by the mere fact of existence that I could absolutely explode. I am seeing stars. I am conceiving plans from my dreams so bright, so bright they sting. I feel so inspired and positive and motivated and ambitious and just all together awesome that I want all of the world to feel me.

Feel how hot I am to touch. Saver how sweet I am to taste. 
Notice how bold I am to hear. Inhale how comforting I smell.
And visualize how intricate I must be.
I must be and you must be.
And you are me. You are me.


Everything that surrounds 
from here on out
is exactly
what I want.
If I feel insane
eventually
for making the same mistakes
I’ll retract and retreat
and start it all over
until I learn 
until I can fly
without wings


I’m really really really happy right now.
I think I have finally come full circle.
I am starting to understand myself 
and what my personal journey
and purpose have meant.

I am realizing who I am 
and what I’m about.

I feel so whole, so content, so complete, so worry free.
I am feeling all burdens vanish into air.
I am exhaling my long held breath.
I’m letting it all out and taking it all in.

All of this is stream of consciousness. All of this is truth that is alive within me.
I am so incredibly inspired that it is difficult to just sit here and not wake everyone I know up with the good news. That life is so beautiful, so ephemeral, so pure and potent. Nothing can replace a single second. Each moment so precious and well defined. I will never let go of anyone at anytime. If you need me. I’ll be there. 


“Let me fill your heart with joy and laughter. Togetherness, girl it’s all I’m after. Whenever you need me, I’ll be there.”

I just made my cat do a hand stand. I want you all to know that I love you. All of you. Each and every single one. No more and no less. Well truth be told I might care more for certain folks more than most but that’s earned ever so slowly and gracefully. 

I love human interaction and realizing the connection we all share within a conversation whether brief or long. Just that moment, that second, you know you belong. Right exactly where you are at this point in time. Nothing matters but the present. So be as big as you wish or as tall as you dream. 
Be a monster, a princess, a prom or drag queen. Be a cashier, a waitress, a secretary, a model. Be bold, be in charge, be excited, and zesty. Hold true to your truth to your intuition and your feelings. Know what your heart’s true desire is and do your damnedest to fulfill it.

No good deed goes unpunished. By friends I am turning twenty one in three days. I’m a little nervous but by all accounts I am excited. This weekend and this year are going to be righteous to the maximum. I want all bad vibes to be put behind us now. I want only good to linger. 

So have whatever dish you wish to dine with
and any girl or boy you choose.
Because in the end you have absolutely nothing but you fears to lose.

Let go of your fears.
They are only holding you back.
Let the good times roll.
Let the music play. 
Sing along to every song you know.
Stop being so cautious with ever single word or thought.
Provoke the world to imagine a better way
And do it. Do it to it.


If you cannot expect to understand 
and be the ever living example of everything 
you wish to exist and be complete and right
then you will never see it exist. 
For something you desire to be manifested
it must first enter this world in you.
Through you and by you.


Gandhi rocked it like no other 
“Be the change you wish to see in the world”

So be happy be healthy
be inspired and free
Show the world the best
example of ME


And if at a moment of despair do not fret
“for this too shall pass”
All moments are spectacular and individual
we are to live to experience
so impress what you love 
and rid your mind, body, and spirit of the rest.

May you all have the courage to be what it is you really want to be and not be held back by the gloved hand of a master you cannot see. If none of this is real and if all of it is fake then does that mean that we are all just pretending to exist?

Regardless of this or that
We are alive to soak up everything we can
And I am the sponge
I want wisdom, I want truth, I want knowledge, I want conversation, I want connection, I want satisfaction from the inner working out.

Wake up Wake up Wake up
and smell your own stink
Rid your mind, body, and spirit
of all you do not regard as ‘right’
but remember it is best first to put
a finger in the water to try and understand 
a temperature

What of everything you know?
What of everything you don’t?

Teach me something, I have five or more senses with which I can intake all you have to share.

Love life because life is love and love is life.
Love is 
Life is
And you are.
We are.

I guess to be truthful and frank and so on
I just love being alive and sometimes I forget how delicious it is to partake of air. To be able to breath and to be alive. I forget how awesome it is to have all opportunity available even though they can seem so far. There is no truth so honest as the truth within oneself.

Have a night or have a day whenever you read this, have it your way. 

// Stupid Lazy Boy//

Waking up in the morning to a full plate of breakfast right next you in bed must feel good. Does it make you feel complete? Knowing that you have your warmth of the shelter, the comfort of a meal, and the love of another that graciously prepares and delievers to you each day.

And you get dressed and go off to work. You kiss her goodbye and as you pull away from the drive with nothing but ordinary and as usual written on your face, she waves fairwell.

She starts to pack her bags. First things first, the clothes, the shoes, the makeup, the boxed letters and poets she hid from you, the paintings she hung on the walls. The coffee maker, she’ll need that at the very least. So she doesn’t pick up after you today. She just packs and goes on her way.

She left without warning. Without even the slightest alarm. There is something in here moving her to run. She can’t be settle in this world you want her in. A box with two bedrooms just in case. A nice kitchen and dinning room set. A beautiful couch and love seat and your stupid lazy boy.

And it defines you in more ways than one. You stupid, lazy boy. You don’t realize what you have. You don’t really understand all she has offered and all that has already been given to you. You stupid, lazy boy you have no hope in living. You just wait for the next day. You don’t even appreciate your own breath. You stupid, lazy boy she was the only freedom you had.

Someday man will see that we have chosen all of this for ourselves. And on that day we will all pull into our oversized parking lots or guarges with out heavy duty vehicles and we will shut and lock the doors as usual. We will enter the home like every other day. We will not feel her absence. But once we start looking around and feel nothing but emptiness we will then realize.

We will realize what we have given up for our stupid nine to fives. We will realize what knowledge, what wisdom we have truly sacrificed by our laziness of vehicles and televisions. We will realize our pride and our envy and that they are both in vain. We will realize our wrath immediately, here after and all we will want to do is cry. We will want to curl back into ourselves. Into the spirits that we are. But until we wake up from this pattern of living, this lifestlye of denial and spiritual blindness we will never see the face to true freedom.

Stupid Lazy Boy, you thought you had it all. You thought you knew it all.
Stupid Lazy Boy, what does it feel like to come into conflict with yourself on such a level that it is rising like fire in your veins? Does it make you want to move? Does it make you want to agrue? Does it make you want to write, to paint, to draw? Does it make you want to experience life for all it’s beauty and all it’s true. A beauty and truth recognizable by all humans?
Does it make you want to deny me, freedom even more for fear that you have in fact been wrong in your existence all along?

I don’t mean to cause frustration and I don’t mean to cause angry.
I don’t mean to cause sadness and I don’t mean to cause despair.
But I certainly do not mean to cause apathy in thee.
Oh Stupid Lazy Boy, you have power beyond your knowledge.
Do you’re best to wake up. There is a whole universe out there. Why don’t you look around? Tell me what you really see!